Every Last Shard
by HibariKyoya913
Summary: "No matter what he had done to him, Hibari knew that he loved Gokudera Hayato with every last shard of his anguished heart." 1859 Yaoi - no smut. Don't like? Don't read. One-shot. Tear-jerker. Enjoy! Please review!


**A/N: I cannot believe I've written this! I am honestly in tears right now and I'm not even sure where this came from. I just sat down to write like half an hour ago and this was the finished product. I really hope someone likes this as much as I do, so I beg you to review to let me know what you think!**

**Disclaimer: Anything you recognise is not mine! **

"So t-this was all just revenge, f-for giving d-detentions?" Tears were choking him, and he couldn't even get the words out properly.

"Of course it was Hibari, you couldn't seriously think anyone would actually love you!" The cruel reply, spoken around an odd, sadistic smile, tore into the aforementioned Prefect like a thousand knives and the tears finally fell, the heartbroken boy unable to hold them back anymore.

"Sorry, please just don't, please, I lov-" the reply was small and weak, interrupted by a broken sob that Hibari didn't know he was holding in.

A scoff was heard and then nothing. Complete silence engulfed the roof of Namimori as the raven haired boy watched the door his love just walked out of.

He should have known. What Gokudera had just said to him was true and Hibari knew it. Nobody would ever love him, he was worthless, he was weak.

Hibari fell to his knees and then slumped forward onto the cold floor of the roof, unable to hold himself up through the pain. He lay there and cried, cried for his broken heart, and cried for his weakness.

He hated that he had fallen in love and that he had let himself get hurt. He never trusted anyone before Gokudera, and now he knew why - the pain that someone you trust can bring is too much, too excruciating. He cursed himself for being so stupid, for believing that someone as perfect as his Hayato could ever be his for real, could ever love him back. He never knew that Gokudera was so angry with him for the way he had acted before, never knew just how much the boy resented him for those detentions, but it was clear now that Hibari's love loathed him, despised him.

Was this amount of drawn out cruelty necessary though, did he need to get his heart ripped out, torn to pieces and then stomped on right in front of him before Gokudera though he had suffered enough?

The sun had set, and the temperature was getting rapidly cooler as the night was closing in, but Hibari was numb, unfeeling. He had been slumped on the roof for hours, and was paling and his skin was transforming to a fitting shade of blue from the cold, but he couldn't make himself want to get up. He had lost hope when he had lost his heart and he couldn't bear the thought of going back to the suffocating loneliness he had felt before he had been approached by Gokudera, he couldn't bear the thought of having to live with no reason for living anymore.

His teeth were chattering and he felt lighter, like he was more free with every shuddered breath he took and every stretched second he counted. He figured he must be dying, must be finally dying. The thought didn't bother him as much as he had thought it would. Hibari Kyoya was a fighter, a survivor, but he had lost his will and was giving in to the cold, December night. He found it vaguely ironic that after all the effort he had spent staying alive, he was just wasting it over some boy - like one of those stupid girls at Namimori.

But Gokudera was not just some boy, Gokudera was the only boy he could ever love, and the only one to ever even pretend to love him back. Even if he had the strength to walk away from the rooftop, he wouldn't because now he knew what would always be missing from his life and he could never be happy.

He could feel his breath catching more and more as the minutes passed and he knew it wouldn't be long, wouldn't be long until he was set free. Maybe the cloud was always meant to be set free, to spend forever in the sky, never really there.

The Prefect closed his tired yet sharp grey eyes, eyes that were still stinging from the tears that continued to fall in slow droplets down his freezing face. He tried to think of the best times in his life, the moments he needed to comfort him as he died. All he could remember was Gokudera.

_"Hibari, I wanted to umm... talk to you about something." _

_"What, herbivore?"_

_"I love you."_

The confession confused him at the time and he didn't know what to do, but he knew that he felt the same and that it was one of the best moments of his life. More of his time with Gokudera floated through his mind, bitter in their sweetness.

_"One kiss? Fine." More than one kiss was stolen, but Hibari couldn't find it in him to complain. That strange feeling of love and happiness and content was making it impossible to argue._

_"I've never done this before." I'm scared was left unsaid by the Prefect, but Gokudera knew him too well, and he knew exactly how to reassure his boyfriend. "Neither have I, but I love you. Relax."_

_"Do you love me Hibari, you've never said it before?" Hibari had loved him from the beginning, but his walls were up too high for him to admit it. Looking at Gokudera Hayato in that moment though, he murmured a small but sure "Yes, I love you" and gave himself fully to the silver haired teen._

The tears on his face were streaming faster and faster and the shattered pieces of his heart ached as he tried to block out the thought that all of that was just a lie, that none of it was real. That Gokudera, the Gokudera who had taken his first kiss, first time and who had been the first one to see the real Hibari had never been his, had never loved him.

No matter what the boy had done to him though, Hibari knew that he was so grateful for the lie, so grateful that he got to experience love and happiness even though for the bomber it was just pretend. No matter what he had done to him, Hibari knew that he loved Gokudera Hayato with every last shard of his anguished heart.

So, on the 13th December a broken hearted boy by the name of Hibari Kyoya died, alone and cold on the peacefully silent but desolate rooftop of his beloved school. As he took his last breaths, and shed his last tears for the boy he loved until the end, the first snowflakes of winter fell and the world seemed to still for a silent minute, the muttered "I love you" of the lost boy seemed to carry through the wind and shake the trees for a second before they too, fell into the deepest of slumbers.

Fin.

**Thank you, if you read this to the very end and I really hope you enjoyed it!**

**Review? Pretty please with a cherry on top! ;)**

**I'll love you forever! :P**


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